Damn girl, no need to flash your gun. It’s just a latte!

One would think I have something against cops – not true. I found this story this morning and thought it was rather amusing. For the record, I give the Police in my town cold bottled water in the summer months (we don’t have traffic lights – so they direct the traffic) occasionally.

However, it’s in poor taste to demand free coffee and baked goods, Officer!

An open letter to University of Iowa’s President Sally Mason

Dear Dr. Mason:

I know you think your football endowment is hugely important, but what of the life of a young woman who tried desperately, as I did, to report her rape? You told her you were protecting the victim’s “educational records”. That’s some education she got. Did it occur to you to report it to the real Police and the DA’s office? I don’t care how you parse your words like Virginia did, it’s YOUR responsibility to get this girl to the authorities. I’ll bet her report looks like mine – 4 pages of handwritten bullshit with no letterhead, no signature, no date. What in your right mind, like that of the University of Virginia’s Dean Robert Canevari, makes you think that the University is equipped to handle its own investigation of itself?

I’ve also heard that line that an “informal” investigation would go quicker for the accuser. You tried to lull someone whose life was torn apart into a sense of false security. You lied to her, a confused girl who came to you and your cohorts for help of the most basic human level and you had no respect for her dignity. Funny how the two alleged perpetrators have been charged, indeed, and also left the team after the incident. The mother of this girl wrote you a four page letter and you buried it. And I quote:

“After a trip to the hospital, she (the accuser) and her father went to the athletics department with the allegations. According to the letter, she was interviewed by Gary Barta, the Iowa athletics director, head football coach Kirk Ferentz, and Fred Mims, an associate athletics director. The woman claims that she was pressured to keep the case “informal” or within the athletics department. The mother wrote that the woman was told a “formal process” would be “long and arduous” compared with the “swift” informal process led by the athletics department.” Please – that’s code for “let’s not do a thing and it will go away”. It will be too late to do anything if no one knows.

You did this woman, the Clery Act, the higher education system, yourself and your school a grave disservice. Parents, do not send your children to the University of Iowa. Football is king – dignity, hearts, minds and bodies of young people are acceptable losses, according to Sally Mason.

“Purse parties”? Save your money and buy the real deal.

These women are really not comprehending their actions as the sweatshops and organized crime involved in producing masses of fake luxury handbags, sunglasses, etc. might give them pause. Or do they know what they’re doing? The next time you venture to Canal Street, buy on eBay or go to a “purse party” – that’s the first I have heard of this, think to yourself: do I want a tacky fake (that has implications down the line and endangers lives), or would I rather work hard and buy the real thing, which will last for years?

I would rather have 3 nice bags than 20 crappy (fake) ones. But tell that to middle American girls, who have been made to believe we all live life like “Sex in the City” and have Prada and Louis Vuitton pouring from our perfect California Closets.

Can you believe they make over $200K in some cases? Do they represent the bags as authentic? Can you believe the sentencing guidelines? Discuss. PS – that’s me at Court. With a Jimmy Choo Theola Ramona. It has lots of buckles and straps to play with when you’re nervous and it’s huge enough to carry all of your troubles. It also started “handbag-gate” – my regular readers will know what I mean.

I must get this off my chest.

Once upon a time, my therapist told me to read silly celebrity gossip blogs to make me laugh and divert my attention while having a panic attack. For the most part, they are poison. But, if you don’t take them seriously, they can be funny. MK, the hilarious blogger over at DListed, is the funniest there is and not for the fainthearted. Pop Sugar brings you the news in a nice way.

A word to Perez Hilton: you have really gone too far. If one reads Perez’s blog, each girl or woman is a “bitch”, “slut” or “whore” – while the men on the blog can do no wrong. For example: Ethan Hawke, who began dating his and Uma Thurman’s former nanny, Ryan Shawhughes, got her pregnant and married her. Yes, it’s scandalous, but Mr. Hawke remains untouched by the poison digits of Perez. He calls Ms. Shawhughes, “dumb pregnant whore”. In the past 24 hours, we’ve seen him call Khloe Kardashian “reality whore”, “tranny” and “prison bitch”, Rumer Willis is “potato head”, Lindsay Lohan is “LezLo”, Lauren Conrad is “beef curtains”, Vanessa Hudgens (on vacation with Zac Efron) “that whore”, Ashlee Simpson is “Asslee”, Sienna Miller is “Sluttyenna” Miller, Miley Cyrus is a “slut”, . When Nicole Kidman decided to have some class and NOT sell her baby’s first picture, Perez calls her “rude” ponders, “is her baby photo even worth millions?”. He speculates that a very pregnant Gwen Stefani’s “huge belly” means she’s having twins. Stefani looks like any woman in her final weeks of pregnancy; even better! Ugh, I could go on.

Only Angelina Jolie, Madonna, Salma Hayek, Cristian Ronaldo, Elton John (“Poppa Perez”, ugh), Tori Amos and Paris Hilton are spared, basically, except for outed celebrities and “manly” men. And maybe Tom Cruise because he’s scared the Scientologist will sue his ass.

I know that by blogging this, I’ve only drawn more attention to him, but Perez needs to know that celebs are people too and their foibles can be human. Instead of reporting about how Fidel Castro is really dead, he could highlight the silliness of celebrities without being so incredibly hateful. True, some of them are idiots, but no more than the average redneck hopped up on meth who does something moronic.

He does not ever ever disparage men (especially gay men) or those of Latin descent. He will fall all over himself to say something nice about some soccer player, Brad Pitt or the gosh darn Jonas Brothers.

As a gay man, Mr. Mario Lavandeira (his real name; you can guess the origins of his bloggedy name) needs to know that giving women proper respect is part of the culture. As a woman, a crime survivor, a blogger and a Latin American woman, I feel that he sums up the worst of our celebrity-smacking culture. About 50% of my closest friends are gay men and they would not dream of treating women as such. As a rape survivor, who knows all too well the way words like this are tossed around, I am shocked and really embarrassed for him. He has become terribly misogynistic. He’s hurting people. Oh, and by drawing little semen squiggles on people’s mouths, he shows his true colors. I don’t care if Tori Amos things he’s a genius.

He should stop preaching “Drugs are bad, kids!”, “Suicide is never the answer, kids!” “insert incredibly obvious and grating advice here, kids!” – sweet jeebus, he’s become a tired, preachy-ass queen. I think his much-promoted diet has made him all sorts of bitter. Perez, your job, as you described it, was to inform, enlighten and entertain. I wouldn’t normally say this, but college students read his blog second only to Facebook.

He calls himself P-Nasty. That’s appropriate.

Andrew Kissel murder hearings update. Wow.

Part Two of what is widely touted as the “Milshake Murders” of the brothers Kissel of Greenwich seems to be ramping up (finally) after the April 2006 murder of Andrew Kissel, who was murdered right before he was to plead guilty in Federal Court on charges of fraud.

They have since arrested his longtime personal assistant, Carlos Trujillo and HIS cousin, Leonard Trujillo, alleging cash as the motivation (isn’t it always?). Many here believe it took cops two years too long to arrest the wrong guys. Why two years? One would think the personal assistant would be the first suspect. Some salient points:

1) many believe ex-wife Hayley is behind the murder (I say this as a Greenwich resident; not as a belief of my own), calling to mind the Ted Ammon murder by Danny Pelosi. Sort of.
2) the victim’s own father has been quoted as calling Andrew “someone who angered many”. Wow.
3) check out the “come back to Greenwich and get me a Wendy’s burger” story.
4) Leonard’s attorney Mark Sherman is alleging Greenwich cops paid off witnesses. Wow.
5) Kissel owned one of those “KITT” cars from the David Hasselhoff hit, “Knight Rider”. I find this hilarious for some reason.

In creative casting news, John Stamos has optioned the rights to the story and will be producing this M.O.W. for Lifetime Networks and starring as Andrew Kissel. Thoughts on any of this?

Sick T-shirt (and even dumber model agreeing to smile and get paid).

Well – this is fabulous. Tell me, everyone, do you see these on college campuses everywhere? I don’t. I wonder what the sales figures are. I am not surprised that Todd lives his three dogs.

While we’re on topic, check out the other offensive T-shirts (and desperate models who obviously have no idea what they’re selling)David & Goliath are selling. Everyone should be offended by this. It’s not a feminist issue. Just one of dignity, good taste, common sense.

Feel free to write to these fine citizens here to be heard (or ignored).

Lawyer(s) drugged and raped by coworker who likes to brag about it!

Well, I don’t know what to say about this case. Thank you to my agent Ken, for giving me the heads up on this one. I am speechless. I wish for nothing but strength for these women, but I want to say this: please please – should this happen to you, report it. Even if nothing comes of it, there will be a trail leading back to this guy. Please stop the silence – you did nothing wrong.

Good for you, Michelle Moor, for suing. You do whatever it takes to bring Bingham McCutcheon to their knees. Don’t you love their snazzy website and douche-y Chairman video? Rah, rah! If anyone involved in this case needs an ear, you know what to do. Click on the link to the right “STARS Survivors” and an email will find its way to me.

Phi Kappa Psi at head of major college drug sting.

Phi Kappa Psi can boast William Beebe as an illustrious alum – excuse me – according to their attorneys, he never was a member. Okay, he dropped out and came back too many times to actually be formally initiated, however, he did live there at the Phi Kappa Psi house and have his picture in the Phi Kappa Psi photographs. He calls himself a Phi Psi alum and those other dudes his “brothers”. Yes, the ones who after 20 years still can’t bring themselves to speak some truth and help us out.

Today, comes the story that 96 students were busted for dealing drugs at San Diego State. The main fraternities? Phi Kapps Psi and Theta Chi. Can’t say I’m surprised. Just today, the “go to” attorney who was/is defending them in my case let it slip to bystanders that he encouraged his client/witness to lie to the Grand Jury in The Commonwealth v. Beebe case. Counselor, you may not want to brag about that in the future. Sometimes word gets back to the victim and she speaks with the D.A.

Just saying.

Joe Francis – where to begin?

I have avoided blogging about this vile creature forever simply because I could never quite wrap my brain around the precise reasons he was wrong for doing what he does. So, here goes:

Of course, Joe Francis offered the Spitzer gal, Ashley Youmans, a huge amount of money to join his merry band, then rescinded his offer when he realized he already had footage on her for “Girls Gone Wild” in 2003. What offended me most is that he said something to the effect of “she was so much hotter when I got to her”; implying that a woman is past her prime after 18. He also alleged, “oh yeah, I think she had sexual relations with my cameraman”. Please. For some reason, those comments bugged me more than Joe Francis himself (and that’s saying a lot).

So, he’s out of jail, where, as he claims, he was treated “like a rock star”. Well, good for him. A plea deal allowed him to avoid further jail time and got him back his cash and his cars.

There are many reasons to dislike (and, if you’re many folks, revere) Joe Francis – he takes advantage of intoxicated girls on Spring Break and humiliates them at best. He creates an atmosphere where people think it’s okay for these girls to be victimized. For those of you who believe the girls are willing participants and that they should be home reading Bibles and staying pure blah blah blah, feel free to say your piece; I am here to listen. But I would bet the farm that some of these girls are in blackout mode and have no clue what’s happening. Worse yet, the “GGW” scenes you see on the infomercials or on tape are probably the sanitized version of what happens. I’ve received dozens of emails from women who claim to have been sexually assaulted by members of the “GGW” crew or young men egged on by same.

The problem with Joe Francis is that, unlike exotic dancers or even porn actors, these girls are not getting compensated for what they do. Joe Francis is getting compensated, end of story. When Joe was released recently from prison, it seemed he gained three things: long hair, some weight and a new blonde on his arm.

Listen: if you believe in free speech, what Joe Francis does and the fact that he’s just a harmless guy trying to make a buck, you may want to read this. This report really opened my eyes and actually shocked me as to the lengths this douchebag will go to nurture his corporate image. Sure as hell changed my mind and made me loathe the sleazeball. He’s much much worse than an “honest businessman”.

University of Virginia turning its back again; rubs salt in blue and orange wound.

One has to laugh when one looks at the passive-aggressive and sad nature of this. Today, I was trying to look up a former classmate on my web-based alumni link to UVa. Of course, there are passwords and user names in order to read such confidential information, unless you are William Beebe, in which case you telephone the Alumni Office and ask for someone’s home address for your amends-making letter and get it promptly. Alas, I digress.

In the interest of confidentiality, I occasionally check on my own profile. The University of Virginia wiped me from their database as if I never attended, never graduated. I’m just gone. Do they want me to return my diploma because I was raped there by a fellow student and spoke the truth? What does this say about your rights to free speech, privacy, identity and behemoth organizations like public universities? What would you want for your child who earned their degree; an issue separate from the crime?

An added frisson of insult: I was not invited to attend my 20-Year College Reunion this June. I was removed from the invitation list, which does not exactly seem as though that can be done. The Alumni Office confirmed they removed me.

John Casteen, Patricia Lampkin, Carol Wood and all those fine folks there can spin this any which way, but you cannot say that someone who spent four years studying and earned a degree at a school is now not eligible for alumni status and benefits. If anyone reads this, I just thought you may want to know and register your displeasure of how institutions can silence the very brains and voices they so proudly develop. Shoot an email to one of the fine folks mentioned above. Perhaps they forget: William Beebe was the (admitted and convicted) rapist and did not graduate. The Commonwealth agreed and imprisoned him. I did graduate and am a contributing member of society.

Does this make you sad/mad? Or does it not surprise you at all?

UPDATE: Well, within days (hours?) of this post, I received, get this, invitations to my reunion as well as an apologetic “gee, we most certainly did NOT pull your profile out of the Alumni database, but we totally can’t understand how it’s gone”. Yeah, that’s weird how that happens. Apparently, I am now, once again, a graduate. Thanks, guys!